My 10 year old daughter goes to an arts based private school.  Since first grade she has been plagued by an annoying classmate who does anything she can do to get my daughter in trouble.

I can't tell you how many times this girls parents have called and told me "Olivia says that Melissa blah blah blah".  

Last year the girls were on campus for a Girl Scout meeting and I was sitting in my car watching as Olivia grabbed my daughter and tried to throw her down karate style.  She wasn't succesful and my daughter turned around and planted a swift kick to her butt.

After the meeting I was leaving the school and Olivia's dad flags me down to report that Melissa had kicked his daughter in the butt.  I told him I had witnessed the entire incident and it appeared to me to be mutual combat, with his daughter instigating it with a karate throw.

He immediately turned to his daughter realizing that all these years she had been leading them on.  He apologized and excused himself and had a rather heated conversation with his daughter.

Fast forward to about a week ago, I get a call from the school and my daughter has been expelled for punching Olivia's lights out.  I thought 'good for her'.  I realize that as a parent I should have reacted different but I have been waiting for this to happen for years...

I didn't tell my daughter my gut reaction but at the same time, I didn't go over board to punish her.

Anyone else ever have an experience like this?  

--Last edited by mutant_dan on 2007-05-04 12:05:35 --

Well fortunately my kid hasn't had as serious an incident.  We got a couple calls about him and a kid, we'll call xyzzy, doing naughty stuff at school.  We talked to him about it and he said that xyzzy had "plans" and he went along with it.  We explained that he should not do xyzzy's plans when they are a bad idea;  It would also be nice if he could encourage xyzzy not to go thru with his bad plans.  Since then he's come home a couple times and said he wouldn't play with xyzzy because xyzzy had a bad plan and he didn't want to go thru with it.

A while before this, we had xyzzy over for a play date.   Was the only kid he's had over that I am very hesitant to invite again.  He was a pleasant kid but him and my kid just were out of control in a way my kid normally is not.  They tore up all the moss in the BBQ area and made a mess.  They try to disconstruct a rock wall til I intervened.  And when the kid's mom showed up, he and my kid ran into the swamp and me and the kid's mom had to chance them around to get them out.  Then the kid's mom litteraly had to wrestle the kid into his car seat kicking and screaming.  My kid plays nice with all the other kids that come over with no problems.

So, we haven't xyzzy back for a play date.  

It was awkward last night as my kid's Tball time was playing xyzzy's Tball team and I saw xyzzy's parents sitting there and I know the recognized me.  I tried to spend as much time talking to other parents I knew so it didn't look like I was trying to avoid them on purpose.

Like I said, the kid was pleasant, just out of control.  He wasn't mean or anything. If we knew he got his act together, we'd invite him back.  There's other kids that come over that don't cause problems though so they're the ones that always get invited.

Damn kid did it again.  Just got the call from the school....

Well, if will make you feel any better, a couple months ago, my 6yo was suspended from summer camp for a day for  throwing a rock.  That was a major no-no and he was grounded for the weekend.  

The week before that we got a call that he was in trouble for giving a kid a bloody nose on the bus.  Thing was, he was being picked on by two kids that where bigger than him.  He finally had enough and whacked one of them.  We told he he shouldn't hit people but also that it was okay to defend himself.  My wife gave camp an earful about the counsellers on the bus on monitoring the kids closely enough.  

--Last edited by kvk on 2007-10-12 09:02:20 --